Back to the world of blogs. I should say that at night the whole blogging process is eerily reminiscent of that horrid Doogie Howser TV show. Perhaps, like he, I can start by writing a quick re-cap of the day's events and follow it up with an indispensable life lesson along the lines of "...I was still pissed at [best friend], but I wasn't going to let a little money issue get in the way of our friendship. The important thing I learned is that some things are truly more valuable than gold..." With that, I'd turn off the light, get under the covers, and we'd roll the credits.
But I digress. So last weekend was fun. Friday night there was no one around. All my friends were pretty much on call working or taking it easy to get ready for call the following day. So I headed up into Seattle and went to the movies, all by myself. I saw "House of Sand and Fog" which was solid if not perfect. Great acting. For some reason, I always enjoy going to a movie solo-style. Its one of my best cures for a bad mood, actually. (Bowling and golf - NOT good cures). Prior to the movie, I had an hour and a half to kill in downtown Seattle. I got some coffee, walked around, and once again noted that Seattle has got to have my favorite downtown of any city I've spent significant time in. Its sleek looking, clean, walkable, hilly, beautiful, and has a great mix of restaurants, bars, and shops, and book stores. I really wished I lived up there rather than 30 minutes south. (Hopefully I'll be remedying this soon).
Saturday I putzed around the house most of the day and then went up into the city again. I was supposed to meet my friend John, a med school friend doing his residency at UW, for dinner. He got delayed, however, and thus I went and ate sushi all by myself in one of my fav places, "Wasabi Bistro" - a fairly expensive, dimly lit, chic sort of place with great fish. I went to the sushi bar and read "The New Yorker" making me some sort of sassy pseudo-intellectual. My waitress was absolutely stunning and she smiled at me - ALOT. I tried to see if she was smiling that much at everybody or if she was saving that extra something simply for our interaction. It was hard to tell, but I like to think the latter...
[modified]
Sunday I woke up late and went into Tacoma (the lesser city) for a good egg breakfast. I love a good breakfast place. (In this regard, New Orleans will never be topped). "The Harvester" is my place in Tacoma and its solid if not spectacular. Ate a little breakfast, then got some (more) coffee at the local shop, did a little reading, and finally headed home. On the way home, I decided to stop at Best Buy just to "browse". Four hours later and a thousand plus dollars later I was walking out with a brand new computer (I'm typing on it now). I definitely needed one given my previous purchase was 4 years ago. I'm not so sure I needed a high-end "gaming" system, though, but somehow that's what I ended up with. (A phone call from the store involving Eryn may or may not have been involved). Worse, within a single day Eryn had me buying and playing Battlefield 1942 - a game with all the makings of a highly addictive first person shooter. This is something I do NOT have time for. All this after successfully not playing any online games for over a year and a half. I suspect that there is a real test of will coming soon....
And that's that. This week at work is stressful. This is the mid-year "review" week where every resident gets sat down for 45 minutes with the chief resident and the program director and they all talk about your performance over the past 6 months. I hate this shit - always feels like I'm going to the principal. Anyway, mine is on Thursday, and I am NOT pumped about it. Besides clinical issues, residency is wrought with a million administrative tasks which I don't keep up well on and I suspect this is where most of the conversation will center. I'll never forget last year's review when I told them all I was thinking about quitting and probably would if it meant anything besides me going to Iraq. (See I was very, very depressed then). It won't be like that this year, but its weeks like this where I wish I could just run away from my job sometimes - the baggage never ends. Some day there will be a long blog entry about residency and medicine and what I think of it all. Not today, but some day.
And that's when I learned that some things are even more valuable than gold....
This post is really a continuation of the comments from the LAST post, but the character level (on the comments section) was maxxed and hence I'm typing my newest comment as a whole new post and all that starts right here:
Norm - that is a crazy story regarding your old web site and your work boys - yeah, I'd like to avoid all that happening. Do you keep a private journal now? (If so, can I read it? Better yet, can you read it to me while feeding me grapes?)
Liz - *YOU* may link me as Dr. Mike - that is random and therefore OK. And btw Liz, I've always been self-obsessed, just not in such a public nature...
Adam - I think that *YOU* could probably link me as well - also please use a generic name (Doc Mick or the like)
Eryn - Sadly, I don't want any link from baditude yet, namely b/c some people I know (read: Gwendolyn) here actually read your site occasionally which could lead them back...HOME. Or whatever. Anyway, I may just broach the damn idea with Gwen but if I do that then how can I talk about fun female issues? Answer: I can't. Ugh, this is already too stressful. I suppose I could just leave all that stuff out of this thing but again - the funnest and most interesting stuff to discuss is obviously going to be the stuff you want the least amount of non-close friend types seeing, at least for me. (though, oddly, Gwen certainly falls into the close friend category - I suppose there's simply too much recent stuff to include her here comfortably yet...)
Anyway, Eryn, I ask you to wait - the others, link up in random fashion. (Norm, feed me grapes, diary or no diary). Huzzah for the blogs!
Norm - that is a crazy story regarding your old web site and your work boys - yeah, I'd like to avoid all that happening. Do you keep a private journal now? (If so, can I read it? Better yet, can you read it to me while feeding me grapes?)
Liz - *YOU* may link me as Dr. Mike - that is random and therefore OK. And btw Liz, I've always been self-obsessed, just not in such a public nature...
Adam - I think that *YOU* could probably link me as well - also please use a generic name (Doc Mick or the like)
Eryn - Sadly, I don't want any link from baditude yet, namely b/c some people I know (read: Gwendolyn) here actually read your site occasionally which could lead them back...HOME. Or whatever. Anyway, I may just broach the damn idea with Gwen but if I do that then how can I talk about fun female issues? Answer: I can't. Ugh, this is already too stressful. I suppose I could just leave all that stuff out of this thing but again - the funnest and most interesting stuff to discuss is obviously going to be the stuff you want the least amount of non-close friend types seeing, at least for me. (though, oddly, Gwen certainly falls into the close friend category - I suppose there's simply too much recent stuff to include her here comfortably yet...)
Anyway, Eryn, I ask you to wait - the others, link up in random fashion. (Norm, feed me grapes, diary or no diary). Huzzah for the blogs!
Can this blog survive?
So, in starting a web log, or online journal, I've spent way too much time thinking about what the hell the damn thing even is, or why I would want to have one. Also, I might add, the very concept of "blogs" and such were a semi-hot topic of discussion amongst relatively educated this people while downing a few beers in the beautiful Canadian Province of British Columbia this past weekend. Most of this discussion had previously occurred between myself and my good friend Leah (classmate from med school). During the weekend, however, we enlisted some outside opinions as well. At first, Leah and I were pretty much all chuckles with the concept of "blogging" using the simple but effective "....I blogged about it yesterday" as a sassy conversation capper regarding anything and everything, but mostly in reference to something relatively straight-forward and mundane presented in a tortured artist, pseudo-deep sort of way. (In other words, the humor was in our perception of what the average blogger (who we pictured to be a stuffy college kid hell-bent on becoming the next Morrissey) might think about their own writing and thoughts about the world - namely holding it in a laughably lofty regard) Example:
Me: "Leah, how many cups of coffee are you drinking these days?"
Leah: "Well, I was at two regular with a latte in the afternoon, but I switched to 2 Lattes. Sound crazy? Well, there's meaning behind it - you can read my blog last Tuesday for the full story."
Chuckles ensue for Leah and myself.
OR, another example:
Leah: "Mike, don't you think there should be more minority politicians?"
Me: "Sure there should be - all I know, Leah, is that racism sucks - see my blog, last Wednesday, for more thoughts"
Chuckles ensue.
(The key is to have the reply in a mildly condescending tone of voice)
The very idea of a "blog", at that point, was a serious source of amusement - especially since it seemed to be the trendy new cyber-chic thing to do for the networked masses - the whole "I'm crazy and wacky, I should have my own blog so everyone can see that!" sort of idea. Following those initial thoughts, however, Leah and I talked (and talked and talked) about it some more.
So what the hell is a blog? I suppose, the politically correct answer is "anything you want it to be" (say it with a flowery voice full of hope). And I guess this is true for the most part. So in browsing the various blogs of my various friends (as well as completely random blogs, links of links, etc), I've ascertained a few trends. (Oddly enough, only a tiny minority of blogs I've seen even approach the kind of pretentious thing Leah and I imagined as noted above, though its still funny to think of it that way). Blogs, for the most part, appear to range from personal records of daily events to collections of musings about anything and also often include talent showcases (art and photography mostly).
They don't really seem to be diaries, though, because for the most part I understand diaries to be a lot of innermost thoughts and vicious revenge plots and things of that nature. A public access "blog" is not an ideal setting for this sort of thing.
So, now that I still don't know what a blog really is (other than "whatever I want it to be"), I asked myself why I would want one. And to be honest, I really didn't - the whole idea came up from various friends who suggested the notion; some seriously, others jokingly. And, on a whim (in pure "me" fashion), I said what the hell and here we are. I suppose the positives are that I get to write (I enjoy writing - see my lengthy club posts, commish notes, movie rants, etc) and in some way it is fun to bounce random thoughts off of people. Also, its a good way to keep people you don't see in the greater loop of your life, which can be a good thing too.
But I see some problems with the whole thing, as well. For one, how personal do you make this damn thing? Right now - not very. Sadly, the things I enjoy discussing (and would enjoy writing about) the most are usually the most personal things, the kind of stuff you'd prefer to discuss in a hazy bar with a good friend over a beer rather than the kind of thing you'd write about willy-nilly on a public forum where anyone with a computer can see it. Can you bash work without the risk of someone at work finding about it and having a highly condemning piece of dialogue write there? Can you talk about your most recent date? What if they find out? Etc. Etc. So that presents a problem.
Also, and perhaps more importantly, who the hell am I? Over the years, I've learned that I sort of mold myself to the people around me. This sounds a little psychotic, and call it 'wanting to be loved', or whatever, but it feels like I've amassed about 18 different "Mikes" over the years. Each one is truly me, but with certain facets enhanced or downplayed based on the current crowd. I think this is some weird thing I've developed to facilitate a tighter bond with everybody I encounter; though in the past year I've noted some problems that go with it, especially when different groups merge. For the record, there's definitely a "generic San Diego Mike", a "Leah Mike", an "Eryn Mike", a "Iwan Mike", a "Cameron Mike", a "med school Mike", a "work (residency) Mike", a "Family Mike", and certainly several more, nearly one for each good friend and a few assorted for the random people. In regard to this blog, I'm sort of overwhelmed by what the hell I would type. I certainly had enough trouble with the title - should it be Mike, Stup, Discostup, Mick, Captain, or Doctor? (Or "Michael" for a very special, Papa Stup directed Blog)? For the moment the entire Blog enterprise is targeted at the San Diego crowd, and thus that's where I leave it, for now. But I can't imagine my parents, or most of the people I work with (and with whom I have a "professional", or in other words boring relationship with) ever reading this stuff - and frankly I don't really want them to. So that whole aspect leaves the greater questions of "what do I talk about?" and "who do I show this thing to?" wholly unanswered. And if I can't answer that stuff, why the hell don't I just stick to the WCD club, anyway? Its always provided the outlet I've needed.
Sadly, I think some of these issues make the average blog and possibly my blog a sort of middle ground of thought, which really feels blase in the long run. Is that sort of thing even worth writing? We've all seen the observational humor of Seinfeld. I mean, after a certain number of "Traffic sucks and here's why" posts get slapped up, is anyone still going to want to read the thing? Am I still going to want to write it?
Thus, in the greater scheme, I still have no idea what the hell I'm doing. But there go some thoughts on the whole process, for starters. So, I suppose I'll just wing it for a while and reserve the right to cancel this thing at any time.
So, in starting a web log, or online journal, I've spent way too much time thinking about what the hell the damn thing even is, or why I would want to have one. Also, I might add, the very concept of "blogs" and such were a semi-hot topic of discussion amongst relatively educated this people while downing a few beers in the beautiful Canadian Province of British Columbia this past weekend. Most of this discussion had previously occurred between myself and my good friend Leah (classmate from med school). During the weekend, however, we enlisted some outside opinions as well. At first, Leah and I were pretty much all chuckles with the concept of "blogging" using the simple but effective "....I blogged about it yesterday" as a sassy conversation capper regarding anything and everything, but mostly in reference to something relatively straight-forward and mundane presented in a tortured artist, pseudo-deep sort of way. (In other words, the humor was in our perception of what the average blogger (who we pictured to be a stuffy college kid hell-bent on becoming the next Morrissey) might think about their own writing and thoughts about the world - namely holding it in a laughably lofty regard) Example:
Me: "Leah, how many cups of coffee are you drinking these days?"
Leah: "Well, I was at two regular with a latte in the afternoon, but I switched to 2 Lattes. Sound crazy? Well, there's meaning behind it - you can read my blog last Tuesday for the full story."
Chuckles ensue for Leah and myself.
OR, another example:
Leah: "Mike, don't you think there should be more minority politicians?"
Me: "Sure there should be - all I know, Leah, is that racism sucks - see my blog, last Wednesday, for more thoughts"
Chuckles ensue.
(The key is to have the reply in a mildly condescending tone of voice)
The very idea of a "blog", at that point, was a serious source of amusement - especially since it seemed to be the trendy new cyber-chic thing to do for the networked masses - the whole "I'm crazy and wacky, I should have my own blog so everyone can see that!" sort of idea. Following those initial thoughts, however, Leah and I talked (and talked and talked) about it some more.
So what the hell is a blog? I suppose, the politically correct answer is "anything you want it to be" (say it with a flowery voice full of hope). And I guess this is true for the most part. So in browsing the various blogs of my various friends (as well as completely random blogs, links of links, etc), I've ascertained a few trends. (Oddly enough, only a tiny minority of blogs I've seen even approach the kind of pretentious thing Leah and I imagined as noted above, though its still funny to think of it that way). Blogs, for the most part, appear to range from personal records of daily events to collections of musings about anything and also often include talent showcases (art and photography mostly).
They don't really seem to be diaries, though, because for the most part I understand diaries to be a lot of innermost thoughts and vicious revenge plots and things of that nature. A public access "blog" is not an ideal setting for this sort of thing.
So, now that I still don't know what a blog really is (other than "whatever I want it to be"), I asked myself why I would want one. And to be honest, I really didn't - the whole idea came up from various friends who suggested the notion; some seriously, others jokingly. And, on a whim (in pure "me" fashion), I said what the hell and here we are. I suppose the positives are that I get to write (I enjoy writing - see my lengthy club posts, commish notes, movie rants, etc) and in some way it is fun to bounce random thoughts off of people. Also, its a good way to keep people you don't see in the greater loop of your life, which can be a good thing too.
But I see some problems with the whole thing, as well. For one, how personal do you make this damn thing? Right now - not very. Sadly, the things I enjoy discussing (and would enjoy writing about) the most are usually the most personal things, the kind of stuff you'd prefer to discuss in a hazy bar with a good friend over a beer rather than the kind of thing you'd write about willy-nilly on a public forum where anyone with a computer can see it. Can you bash work without the risk of someone at work finding about it and having a highly condemning piece of dialogue write there? Can you talk about your most recent date? What if they find out? Etc. Etc. So that presents a problem.
Also, and perhaps more importantly, who the hell am I? Over the years, I've learned that I sort of mold myself to the people around me. This sounds a little psychotic, and call it 'wanting to be loved', or whatever, but it feels like I've amassed about 18 different "Mikes" over the years. Each one is truly me, but with certain facets enhanced or downplayed based on the current crowd. I think this is some weird thing I've developed to facilitate a tighter bond with everybody I encounter; though in the past year I've noted some problems that go with it, especially when different groups merge. For the record, there's definitely a "generic San Diego Mike", a "Leah Mike", an "Eryn Mike", a "Iwan Mike", a "Cameron Mike", a "med school Mike", a "work (residency) Mike", a "Family Mike", and certainly several more, nearly one for each good friend and a few assorted for the random people. In regard to this blog, I'm sort of overwhelmed by what the hell I would type. I certainly had enough trouble with the title - should it be Mike, Stup, Discostup, Mick, Captain, or Doctor? (Or "Michael" for a very special, Papa Stup directed Blog)? For the moment the entire Blog enterprise is targeted at the San Diego crowd, and thus that's where I leave it, for now. But I can't imagine my parents, or most of the people I work with (and with whom I have a "professional", or in other words boring relationship with) ever reading this stuff - and frankly I don't really want them to. So that whole aspect leaves the greater questions of "what do I talk about?" and "who do I show this thing to?" wholly unanswered. And if I can't answer that stuff, why the hell don't I just stick to the WCD club, anyway? Its always provided the outlet I've needed.
Sadly, I think some of these issues make the average blog and possibly my blog a sort of middle ground of thought, which really feels blase in the long run. Is that sort of thing even worth writing? We've all seen the observational humor of Seinfeld. I mean, after a certain number of "Traffic sucks and here's why" posts get slapped up, is anyone still going to want to read the thing? Am I still going to want to write it?
Thus, in the greater scheme, I still have no idea what the hell I'm doing. But there go some thoughts on the whole process, for starters. So, I suppose I'll just wing it for a while and reserve the right to cancel this thing at any time.
Blogging takes work. (This is my first crack observation). I just spent 25 minutes thinking of a title for this damn thing and I'm still not satisfied. Then I spent another 10 minutes trying to figure out how to add comments (I mean, really, what is a blog without comments?). I'll be enlisting the help of the more computer savvy for this task most likely tommorrow. I just returned from Whistler, B.C. after a 3-day weekend of snowboarding, drinking, hanging with friends, and doing my best to avoid cheap drunken hook-ups. I'm happy to say I succeeded at all those tasks (for once). Canada is the coolest. Most importantly, the Philadelphia Eagles lost this weekend and all is right with the NFL. What's even better is that they consistently lose in the NFC Championship game (3 years in a row now) making them some sort of slanted variant of the 1990's Buffalo Bills.
More about my weekend in the coming days. Now its off to bed. And then to work. (Let it be known that no mundane detail of daily life is exempt from this blog).
"But they're gonna see the BIG BOARD!!!"
More about my weekend in the coming days. Now its off to bed. And then to work. (Let it be known that no mundane detail of daily life is exempt from this blog).
"But they're gonna see the BIG BOARD!!!"
Well, here it is. Following various discussions with various friends regarding the ins, outs, and social role of blogs, blogging, bloggers, and blog readers, I've decided to accept the dares and challenges of those who would see me blog (you know you are), take the bull by the horns, and create my own damn blog. I'm not quite sure what form it will take, and I'm not sure how often I'll post, what I'll talk about (or what I'll hold back), or if it will even keep my (or anyone else's) interest past 3 full posts. Those details remain to be seen. For now, there's nothing really to say - only that this blog exists. And that the whole endeavor has me rather giddy.
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