Who let that ape out?

I don't know who let that ape out, but I'm sure glad they did. (Warning - mild spoilers.)

With Lord of the Rings being a tough act to follow, I was curious to see how "PJ's" latest, King Kong, would turn out. Well, it didn't disappoint. I only vaguely remember the original, but I know the story (and the ending) of course, and was eager to see this newest adaptation. Especially given the fact it was being done by one of the "new masters" of cinema.

The movie is a classic three-act play sort of thing. Act one could aptly be called "The Setup". Act two, by far the most fist pumping portion of the film, should be heretofore known as "Effing Pissed", because everybody and everything gets unbelievably pissed on good old Skull Island as the prehistoric shit hits the prehistoric fan. The natives are pissed. Jack Black is pissed. Dinosaurs are pissed. And of course, Kong is pissed. And I can't lie - the biggest reason I wanted to see this film was because I knew a giant silverback was going to essentially get pissed and start going- pun intended - absolutely ape shit.

Enter Jackson's genius at building scenes up to the point where I was sitting there, frothing at the mouth, waiting for Kong to go straight WWF on those nasty V Rexes (yes, apparently they're evolved from T Rexes and are known as V. Rexes - I looked it up) who just couldn't leave well enough alone. The scenes where Kong and the Rexes (yes, that's plural) square off is so sweet I get giddy just thinking about it. Its partly from the build up - but mostly because by that point in the film you are already feeling for Kong and you already like Naomi Watts. And when you see Ms. Watts scream in distress, and Kong makes the critical realization that these dinosaurs are to blame, you just sit there in the theater, nod it up and think "those mutha-effin V. Rexes best look out. Kong doesn't like their punk-ass style one bit and he's going to straight jack their shit up." And let me tell you - Kong does NOT disappoint.

(Aside: I can't imagine anything cooler than an angry giant gorilla (except MAYBE for an angry giant Grizzly bear). So I was definitely in a happy place when said gorilla was on screen and justifiably pissed, throwing shit, beating his chest, schooling V. Rexes - the works. This is the sort of movie you have to see in a theater. There's just no two ways about it. Iwan and G Mount - I was definitely thinking about you guys on this one; Iwan, you'll be pleased to know that Kong uses one of Bart the B's classic "log moves" - look for it. I think it was basically an homage to the master...)

The third act, which should heretofore be titled "Mankind sucks - period", is when the film takes it's horrifically depressing downturn. The ending of this movie, while so well known, is so unbelievably soul-crushing in its sadness. Gwen was a bawling heap for the last 20 minutes of this thing, even worse than the end of ROTK - which is saying something. And I must say, I was even finding it "a little dusty" in the theater by that point as well. Jackson brandishes and wields this incredible emotional knife and just keeps twisting the hell out of it for the last 15 minutes to the point that I basically left the theater thinking that human beings had no redeemable qualities.

All in all, though, a top notch flick, as I had more or less expected. Also a lot more depressing than I expected. Prepare yourself, the ending is just plain gut wrenching.

But when the DVD comes out, I'll basically be watching the middle third of the movie over and over again until forced to buy a man-sized inflatable V. Rex just to practice Kong's moves on. (Insert one of infinitely possible sex-with-inflatable-V-Rex jokes here).

Barry Lyndon

According to my Netflix account, "Barry Lyndon" was shipped to me in Seattle on April 29th, 2004. I still have it. I recently, and finally, got around to watching it. I've had a long and sordid affair with staring at the Barry Lyndon DVD, trying to gather the energy to finally sit down and watch it. The thought of the movie had left me torn. On the one hand, it is a Kubrick film. (Kubrick is essentially my favorite director). On the other hand, it is in the vile sub-category of 18th century European period piece - a genre for which I have no love lost. Here is the little preview on the Netflix cover:

"How does an Irish lad without prospects become part of 18th-century nobility? For Barry Lyndon (Ryan O'Neal) the answer is: any way he can!...." (it just sort of goes on from there)

Anyway, I finally overcame the inertia to not watch it, sat down, and watched it. And suprisingly (or NOT suprisingly given it's a Kubrick piece), it's not half-bad. Certainly not Kubrick's best, in my opinion. But it definitely had some Kubrick trademarks, and overall succeeds in making that whole time period look ridiculous, which I think is half the point of the satire there, and which I agree with. My favorite scene is when Lyndon's blue-collar-at-heart character turns into a "mini Kong" and basically goes ape shit on his hoity-toity step-son in the middle of some ritzy parlor. That savage beating, to me, represents what that whole period needed - a good swift kick in the head to knock that class-driven, pretentious, fake mannered, birth-rite-over-merit society into next week. And as is typical of nearly all Kubrick films, it is visually stunning. I give it 3.5 out of 5 starts to the casual viewer, probably 4 of 5 for any serious Kubrick fan. And now it goes back in the mail, almost a year later....


And lastly for today, some pics of the sweet X-mas tree - 2005 style. Enjoy.